Holy shit cakes Batman! This place is dustier than Hilary Clinton's Vagina! Oh well,thats what happens when you're absent from a page for so long (Curse you Myspace) I forgot how much fun it is to vent here,or at least look at how neat my page looks. A lot f stuff has happend,and i mean a lot,by the ass loads! But that's another story for another day. Lets hope i dont forget to log on again.

I will be hitting the gym for the first half of summer, need to get back in shape and loose all his weight! Dad's out of the country for a month, he went to the world cup then over to Ecuador to check up un family. Ive been dealing with a few hardships, first off it has come to my attention that my stepmother truly despises me, but this doesnt bother me becuse i despise that wench as well. My relationship with Wildaliz ended recently, she had lied to me and betrayed me. She fed me this story that she wast ready for a rel;ationship and in thruth was seeing somenone behind my back and telling people i wasnt worth being in a relationship. I ended that quite harshly i'm afraid. My social life has almost completely faded away, with one small exception. She's going through some personal issues, and even though i try to be helpfull, half the time i end up wondering "Why bother?" but i do it anyway, becuse i really do care for her. It does upset me knowing what's going on with her, oh well. This year has been hard so far, not in terms of work or school, mostly around people. Ive been treated like i'm a bad person, and ive put up with it, but i dont think i can for long. This has also been the longest ive been awake, and i'm greatfull for that. Its given me time to be closer to her, even if its just internet talk and a few encounters, but i want to cherish every moment becuse once i leave like i plan i'm not turning back. It's frustrating when people critize me aboutit, and i guess they are right. But its damn nar impossible to turn my back on her, that either makes me an idiot or a loyal friend. Point is i apreciate the important people in my life and i never take them for granted.

I'm screwed, i have until this thursday to transfer to Atlantic and i havent even started. I'll have to skip work tomorrow and get everything done! Wissh me luck everyone. Time to haul ass! God i'm stressed out....

I have been in front of a computer non stop for weeks now, school, wok, school and work! My hands ache and my eyes are starting to bleed...School's over soon so i'll have a chance to rest, but then zee madness starts again! MADNESS I SAY!!!!

I'm going to start in Atlantic soon, and i need to either update my pc or get a brand new one. For starters i need a scanner, new keyboard and more RAM. This will be a problem since i recently got a new car and i have to pay it. Bills, bills and more bills, i swear i'm really close to using them as TP.

I will ve done with this semester shortly, and when i do i'll transfer to a new college. Words cannot explain how extatic i am about this, fi nally i'll be studying what i'm really good at. They have courses on 3d modeling,game design and stuff. I'll be taking my bacheleors on Visual Arts. I love when new things come my way, since i hate routine, and cant wait to meet all the new people there. If i could dance well,i would out of joy, oh what the hell! *Dances*

Last night i had a talk with my friend, the conversation turned sour as she reminded me of a few things i really didnt need. I confessed to her how i was a little envious of how easily she always found someone,she had a guy lined up right after she broke up. Me on the other hand, aint so lucky,i get rejected a lot. In the past that never bothered me, but recently it has,and i feel lonely. It sickens me when i get like this, nothing good ever comes out of it,i cant draw or write, cant concentrate on anything else. Ive learned how to live and support myself just fine, but it be nice to have someone there waiting for you when you come back from dealing with the world. Someone to just hug you and smile, thats what i need right now. I had to end a few friendships too, seeing as it wasnt helping me. And its been easier for me, but i have high hopes as i'm applying to Atlantic college to finally study visual arts. And i know i'll meet new people there, maybe even that special someone. This shitty feeling of mine will pass(i give it a few hours) but for now i'm stuck in emo mode. P.S. The sounds of clattering keyboards around me are slowly driving me insane O_

Dont think a lot of people know this,but i was banned from Deviant Art recently. Fortunately its only for a week and i have only 3 days to go. I have tons of messeges from from my friends and i feel bad i cant answer back,hopefully they will read this and know why i havent answered back. The reason i got banned was becuse i posted a few chain letters and i guess thats againts the regulations, oh well. So now i'm paying for it, cant complain,i did break a rule,just hope it ends soon cuz i'm going insane...

Well this is it. My very first journal entry, i must say im to damn sleepy to enjoy it. i mean wheres the champagne? But even still my first entry, yay for me *starts to doze off* better get this over with quick....

Trying to edit my journal,its to dull >< Needs flavor!

Nothing like a good work out to feel alive again. I ran my bike for the first time in years, and to finishof the day ihad me some tasty takehome spicy tuna sushi. now time for some good deserved rest ^ ^